life extension haikus

I was found inadequate
By 371 lords
They worked on Wall St.
and were sterile

We tried to breed her
Every summer for the past 15 years
But then the carnival shut us down

life extension

I was down on my luck so
A fifth of Maker’s Mark and
70s sitcom reruns until sleep

What were you thinking?
A duplex, a dog, and
Ride off into the sunset?